No be small Wahala oooooooooooo
Two men met at a bus stop and struck up a conversation. One of them
kept complaining of family problems. Finally, the other man said:
"You think you have family problems? Listen to my situation. A few
years ago I met a young widow with a grown-up daughter and we got
married.
"Later my father married my step daughter. That made my stepdaughter my stepmother and my father became my stepson. Also,my wife became mother in-law of her father-in-law.
Then the daughter of my wife, my stepmother, had a son. This boy was my half-brother because he was my father's son, but he was also the son of my wife's daughter which made him my wife's grand-son.That made me the grandfather of my half-brother.
"This was nothing until my wife and I had a son. Now the half-sister of my son, my stepmother, is also the grandmother. "This makes my father the brother-in-law of my child, whose stepsister is my father's wife, I'm my stepmother's brother-in-law, my wife is her own child's aunt, my son is my father's nephew and I'm My own son's grandfather! And you think you have family wahala
3.6.09
Marriage Rules and Regulations
A typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules:
"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want-and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on the table unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?"
His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex here at seven o'clock every night, whether you're here or not."
"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want-and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on the table unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?"
His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex here at seven o'clock every night, whether you're here or not."
Marriage Rules and Regulations
A typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules:
"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want-and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on the table unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?"
His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex here at seven o'clock every night, whether you're here or not."
"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want-and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on the table unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?"
His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex here at seven o'clock every night, whether you're here or not."
This Thing Called Men
It has two feet,two arms,but never more than one idea on its head or a button on its shirt.
A man is what a woman marries.
To turn a man into a husband is one of the most delicate plastic operation known to civilization.It requires Hope,Faith and Charity.
If you flatter a man,you bore him to death,
If you don't,he wonders what stuff women are made of.
If you are the type that wears gay colors like bright orange,red,yellow, He gazed on women in subtle colors.
If you are the type that takes the back seat and let him do all the talking,He swears you"ll kill him.
If you talk about marriage,he enters into a shell and answer in Mono-Syllables.
If you don't talk about marriage,he wonders how much longer you intend in playing around.
There is no question you"ll hook him.but there will be a time of tolerance.
Maybe you think im lying(Agree Or Disagree)
A man is what a woman marries.
To turn a man into a husband is one of the most delicate plastic operation known to civilization.It requires Hope,Faith and Charity.
If you flatter a man,you bore him to death,
If you don't,he wonders what stuff women are made of.
If you are the type that wears gay colors like bright orange,red,yellow, He gazed on women in subtle colors.
If you are the type that takes the back seat and let him do all the talking,He swears you"ll kill him.
If you talk about marriage,he enters into a shell and answer in Mono-Syllables.
If you don't talk about marriage,he wonders how much longer you intend in playing around.
There is no question you"ll hook him.but there will be a time of tolerance.
Maybe you think im lying(Agree Or Disagree)
The Mental Patient's Act of Love
Jim and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital.
One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there.
Edna promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim out.
When the Head Nurse Director became aware of Edna's heroic act, she immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as she now considered her to be mentally stable.
When she went to tell Edna the news she said, "Edna, I have good news and bad news. The good news is you're being discharged; since you were able to rationally respond to a crisis by jumping in and saving the life of another patient, I have concluded that your act displays that you have a sound mind. The bad news is, Jim, the patient you saved, hung himself in the bathroom with his bathrobe belt right after you saved him. I am so sorry, but he's dead.
Edna replied, "He didn't hang himself, I put him there to dry. How soon can I go home?"
One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there.
Edna promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim out.
When the Head Nurse Director became aware of Edna's heroic act, she immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as she now considered her to be mentally stable.
When she went to tell Edna the news she said, "Edna, I have good news and bad news. The good news is you're being discharged; since you were able to rationally respond to a crisis by jumping in and saving the life of another patient, I have concluded that your act displays that you have a sound mind. The bad news is, Jim, the patient you saved, hung himself in the bathroom with his bathrobe belt right after you saved him. I am so sorry, but he's dead.
Edna replied, "He didn't hang himself, I put him there to dry. How soon can I go home?"
TRUANCY
A brunette, a redhead and a blonde all work in the same office with the same female boss. Every day, they noticed the boss left work early. One day, the girls decided that when the boss left, they'd leave right behind her. After all, she never called or came back, so how was she to know?
The brunette was thrilled to be home early. She did a little gardening and went to bed early.
The redhead was elated to be able to get in a quick workout at her spa before meeting a dinner date.
The blonde was happy, happy, happy to be home, but when she got to her bedroom she heard a muffled noise from inside. Slowly, quietly, she cracked open the door and was mortified to see her husband in bed with HER BOSS!!! Ever so gently, she closed the door and crept out of her house.
The next day, during their coffee break, the brunette and redhead mentioned leaving early again, and asked the blonde if she was with them.
"NO WAY," she exclaimed. "I almost got caught yesterday!"
The brunette was thrilled to be home early. She did a little gardening and went to bed early.
The redhead was elated to be able to get in a quick workout at her spa before meeting a dinner date.
The blonde was happy, happy, happy to be home, but when she got to her bedroom she heard a muffled noise from inside. Slowly, quietly, she cracked open the door and was mortified to see her husband in bed with HER BOSS!!! Ever so gently, she closed the door and crept out of her house.
The next day, during their coffee break, the brunette and redhead mentioned leaving early again, and asked the blonde if she was with them.
"NO WAY," she exclaimed. "I almost got caught yesterday!"
The Ghananian Lady
There was an Ghanaian lady married to a English gentleman who had moved to London. The poor lady was not very proficient in English, but any how managed to communicate with her husband. The real problem arose whenever she had to shop for groceries.
One day, she went to the butcher and wanted to buy pork legs. She didn't know how to put forward her request, and in desperation, lifted up her skirt to show her thighs. The butcher got the message and the lady went home with pork legs.
The next day, she needed to get chicken breasts. Again, she didn't know how to say it, and so unbuttoned her blouse to show the butcher her breasts. The lady got what she wanted.
The 3rd day, the poor lady needed to buy sausages. She brought her husband to the store and ,
What do u think happened?
One day, she went to the butcher and wanted to buy pork legs. She didn't know how to put forward her request, and in desperation, lifted up her skirt to show her thighs. The butcher got the message and the lady went home with pork legs.
The next day, she needed to get chicken breasts. Again, she didn't know how to say it, and so unbuttoned her blouse to show the butcher her breasts. The lady got what she wanted.
The 3rd day, the poor lady needed to buy sausages. She brought her husband to the store and ,
What do u think happened?
Anntiversary Gift
Kofi and his wife Adjoa live in USA. Kofi asks his wife, what she wants for their 20th wedding anniversary.
"Would you like a diamond ring?" he asks.
"Not really," says Adjoa.
"Well how about a new Mercedes sports car?" says Kofi.
"No," she responds.
"What about a new home in Ghana?" he suggests.
She again rejects his offer with a "No thanks."
"Well, what would you like for your anniversary?" Kofi asks.
"Kofi, I'd like a divorce," answers Adjoa.
"Sorry, I wasn't planning to spend that much," says Adjoa.
"Would you like a diamond ring?" he asks.
"Not really," says Adjoa.
"Well how about a new Mercedes sports car?" says Kofi.
"No," she responds.
"What about a new home in Ghana?" he suggests.
She again rejects his offer with a "No thanks."
"Well, what would you like for your anniversary?" Kofi asks.
"Kofi, I'd like a divorce," answers Adjoa.
"Sorry, I wasn't planning to spend that much," says Adjoa.
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